Mother Language: Speaking to the Heart of Your Internationally Adopted Child

"If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his language, that goes to his heart." ~Nelson Mandela

When we first adopted our son from Ethiopia in 2008, he spoke very, very little English.  While I often look back at those initial months and think to myself that language was not "that big a deal," the truth is...it was.  It was everything initially.  The grace of it is, it worked.  It just did.  He understood our hearts more than our words at first, and God knit us together as a family...through charades in. every. sentence.  By me holding up objects trying to guess what he was talking about, by him learning by trial and error which word referred to the cover on his bed, and how if he said it another way we all gasped and called it "the S word."  Bless him.

When he first came home, I had such a learning curve.  And, while I didn't do it all "right," I did what I could.  Thankfully, there are some wonderful resources available to families who adopt older kids.  Because we want to reach our kids' hearts, not just train them in linguistics or simply teach them a new language.  (I can't go another moment without mentioning Simple Language for Adoptive Families.  GET IT.

In 1999, UNESCO (United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization)  launched an "International Mother Language Day" (IMLD) to be observed throughout the world each year on February 21. According to their website, "This celebration is designed to promote linguistic diversity and multilingual education, to highlight greater awareness of the importance of mother tongue education."

This is a photo of my son in 2008, days after he had come to his new home.  (The original post that goes with this photo is on my homeschool blog here.)  I remember this so clearly!  The book he is reading in the photo is one that I was able to find that was written in Amharic and English.  It was so helpful to him to have resources here, that he could pick up and look at, try to decipher, and feel like he was reading.   


  The book he is reading is Silly Mammo.  Such a cute story, a folktale from Ethiopia.  We adapted the story into a puppet show and performed it at his orphanage on our adoption trip, and since it was written in Amharic as well as English, I was able to read it in English and the orphanage director would read it in Amharic to the kids.  Such fun!  So, this book is a fun memory for us.  That was important to me.  My other kids had "storybook memories" or reading with us...I wanted those for him as well!  And, we were able to start that right in Ethiopia. 

We bought as many books as we could get our hands on, in Amharic as well as in English, that were (as far as I could ascertain, if they were in Amharic) well-written uplifting stories, quality illustrations, or folktales from his culture.  Many are listed on Amazon when you click on Silly Mammo.  Clickety-click around and see what you can find! And...if you find something, snag it.  I am realizing that many of the links in my sidebar are dead links now...things quickly become unavailable.  

It was super important to me, in those early months, to be able to teach him the Bible in his heart language.  Our experience in missions has been beneficial in that way, so I had some picture resources.  But one resource that we have used with great success in Ghana popped into my head one day before we went to bring him home: "The Jesus Film."  As it happens, there is a version of The Jesus Film for children, called "The Story of Jesus for Children," and it is available in Amharic on DVD from the site, or to watch online here. He watched that video over and over.  (Note:  He was 10 years old, and there is, of course, a crucifixion scene.  He could handle it, but for younger kids you might use discretion.)  Bible.is, with its 600+ translations, is also another great resource.  We got him a small iPod at first, and just loaded it up with Amharic audio Bible, as well as Amharic praise music (available on great cd's in Addis, ask your translator or agency) and also available at Abshirokids.com.  We did other things, like label the house, and other strategies.  SO much fun!

Four years later...his Amharic is gone.  He transitioned from Amharic/Charades/English, to Charades/English to...English.  I continue to speak it when I can, travel to Ethiopia every year, cook the food every week, play the music, invite Ethiopians into our home, get him around Ethiopians who speak it...everything a "culturally aware" adoptive parent is to do, and more.  But, as I have from the beginning, I am following his lead.  I am listening to his heart.  He doesn't want to speak it now, and that is another post for another day, but I completely understand why.  In the meantime, we still have our resources and our book memories.  And hopefully, when Amharic was his heart language, "Jesus" and "Family" was spoken into it loud and clear.

Blessings on your journey!

#ETC12

I was so excited to attend the "Empowered to Connect" conference last weekend, sponsored by Show Hope and featuring Dr. Karyn Purvis. Amazing, amazing stuff! I want to "unpack" so many of these thoughts in future posts, but for now, here is what I "live tweeted" as I sat and tried to "drink from the fire hydrant" for two days!

• Some parents are trying so hard to save our kids, we're drowning ourselves.
• Recreate the developmental environment/process they missed.
• Give teenagers the same thing you would give a newborn...it just looks different.
• Are any of us adopting/fostering a child that came from a "warm & fuzzy" beginning? (Uh. No.)
• 12+ years old, "diagnosis du jour"= bipolar disorder
• There are answers. Great answers. And it doesn't take a PHD to know them. -Dr. Karyn Purvis
• The essence of connection is "I hear your voice, I feel your need, and when it's in my power I will say yes." Dr. Karyn Purvis
• Nothing we do with our kids will matter if we don't FEEL where they have come from.
• Don't ask him what he did wrong. Ask what he needs
• Honored to be in a room with hundreds of parents who are on the front lines.
• Next session: Understanding a Child's History &Its Impacts" Oh, my child's history absolutely breaks my heart. But I am willing to go there.
• Capacity of the brain is based on early nurture.
• You CAN redo infancy with older kids with respect.
• Don't ever give up on your child. There's a "real boy or girl" in there. God's got a plan for them. Jer29:11 (words from an adoptee)
• I can relate!! I am on the "journey of the wounded healer." God can heal and restore parents AND children.
• It's not an easy journey. But it's a grace journey.
• When we keep them close, the stories come out, healing occurs.
• "When going back makes sense, you are going ahead." -W. Berry (I've got to deal with MY stuff.)
• I have to ask myself "WHY does this bother me so much??" when my buttons get pushed.
• Am I letting my past be an unwelcome guest in my parenting moments? Quit letting it intrude. Go back and make sense of it.
• If I don't guide and lead the way in attachment, I'm putting a lot on a wounded child's shoulders.
• There is no healing without "being with." Being THERE is not being WITH.
• It's a rectangle conspiracy!! Rectangles are getting between the members of our families: iPods, TV's, phones, iPads...
• My goal as a parent: "And they lived faithfully ever after."
• "I didn't like who I had become." I SO appreciate Terri's transparency. Authenticity is KEY.
• My life is a big puzzle, and God gives me pieces at different times. -Terri Coley
• Teaching self-regulation using Nerf guns? My guys will totally go for this.
• LOVING seeing all of the grandparents who are here. I want to be that Nana someday!
• Hear it...live it...hear it...live it. Yes, that's me! I need spaced repetition of all this stuff! There is grace.
• What will I DO with what I know? Jesus, help me implement what You're telling me.
• James 1:27 calls us to enter into their lives. What a privilege!
• Grieve the ideal child in your mind, and love the amazing child right in front of you.
• A huge part of being a lifelong learner is UNlearning. My child is unique! Some of what I've been taught does not apply to him.
• I always want to buy everything on the conference tables at these things. But my kids need food. Sigh.
• If you adopt a child from an orphanage, you've got a survivor.
• My authority is enhanced, not undermined, by sharing power with my child. When I share power I show it is mine to share
• Our kids have come to us with a boatload of broken promises and a broken heart that goes with it.
• Don't expect them to give you words twice if they figure out you're not listening.
• I don't need an elephant gun for every infraction! Try not to break stride.
• Up the levels of structure and nurture if the child is out of control. What if *I* feel out of control? Same approach, I am thinking.
• Answering yes=nurture, no=structure Do we need both? Absolutely!
• When does my God *ever* leave me alone to "cry it out" so I can "self soothe?" Never. Some parenting books get it WRONG.
• FIRST "What do you need?" NOT "What did you do?" Misbehavior is goal-driven.
• You may be prepared for a child from a hard place, but is your church's childcare? Churches need to be in it for the long haul.
• "It's really hard work to bring a child the rest of the way home." Dr. Karyn Purvis
• "It's ok to make a mistake. Scar tissue is stronger than regular tissue."- Dr. Karyn Purvis.

Plan A

It's Orphan Sunday in many churches. There is a precious one in our home who NO LONGER bears the title of "orphan." But, by God's grace he's not the only one! God has graciously adopted ALL of us into His family. I pray we will all think about how, as His adopted children, we are to respond to orphans. WE are God's plan for orphans.

If you are His, YOU are His plan for them.

Plan A.

If You Give A Duck A Cracker

…pretty soon you’ll remember an afternoon just months before, when you were sitting in traffic in a crowded African city, giving those same types of crackers to beggars through the window of a car because you desperately wanted to give all of them... something.

Sharing that memory will cause your Ethiopian son to recall (very matter-of-factly) a time when he was much younger and he was begging in that same city. Once he sang a song for someone and they gave him a bite of pasta. Another time, he shined shoes on the street, hoping to scrounge enough money for a soccer ball.

After a few moments of sharing a vanilla coke and African memories, you’ll be amazed once more by how our amazing God brought such different people together to be on the same side of a car window. To be a family. To make new memories. Like sitting at a Sonic by a lake. Sharing crackers with ducks.

And chances are, next time you see a duck, you may or may not have the urge to give it a cracker, but you'll certainly want to give your son a hug and remember what a survivor he is.

Most of all, you’ll want to give God glory.

MPM, MLK, and a Family Favorite

Wow, the weeks are already starting to fly by! I simply cannot believe it's already the last half of January! I wonder if the February "time warp" will start (that weird way that February always seems to d-r-a-g on forever, even though it's the shortest month, because by that time I'm really ready for March, and spring, and Spring Break, and sunshine, and Easter... I'm a flip flop girl at heart, stuck in my Ugg boots for another few weeks!

Today in the U.S. it's Martin Luther King Day. I love this holiday, I really do. Each year we read about him, discuss the Civil Rights Movement and watch footage of the "I Have A Dream" speech, but if I'm honest, last year and this year it's harder for me. Now I have a black son. And truthfully, he has no idea that there was a time in this country where he couldn't have taken a drink out of the same water fountain or gone to the same school as his brother and sister or have us as parents. I know it's time to begin talking about it, and we will. Up until now I haven't discussed it with him simply because he lacked the English necessary to have it fully explained to him. Now he's got the English, only I don't have the words. I'm praying they will come.

I'm so glad that Ethiopian culture is now interwoven with our family's traditions. Just this weekend we took down the last of our Christmas decorations because we left them up for Genna (Ethiopian Christmas) which was on Jan. 7. This week we will celebrate "Timkat", another Ethiopian holiday! This celebration commemorates Christ's baptism in the Jordan River by John the Baptist. I want to talk more with Minte this week about his own baptism. He's been showing an interest at church and has mentioned in the past that he would like to be baptized. Along with our weekly Ethiopian meal, we will hopefully have some meaningful discussions.

Speaking of family traditions, here's a recipe that means so much to our family. Laura asked us to share (and link) some of our "Family Favorite Recipes." Here is one of my very favorites, and was in fact the subject of my first-ever blog post, where I shared about my grandmother's tube pan going on an interesting journey and making its way back to me.

Nana's Banana Nut Bread

3 cups sugar

1 cup shortening

4 eggs

2 tsp. vanilla

1 1/2 cup buttermilk

2 tsp. baking soda

4 cups flour

3 mashed ripe bananas

1 cup chopped nuts (I usually use walnuts, but frequently leave them out or just sprinkle them on top right before I put it in the oven, in case someone is allergic or doesn't prefer nuts)

Cream sugar and shortening. Add eggs one at a time. Mix well. Add vanilla. In a separate measuring cup, combine baking soda and buttermilk. Add flour and buttermilk alternately, beginning and ending with flour. Add bananas and nuts. Bake in a well-greased and floured tube pan or large bundt pan at 300 degrees for 1 hour 55 min. or two 8" loaf pans for 1 hour 15 min.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So here's what we've got cookin' for dinner this week:

Monday: YO-YO (You're On Your Own)- I actually cooked over the weekend, so we have plenty of leftovers and a basketball game. Mom's out of the kitchen. :)

Tuesday: Chicken n' Dumplings, carrots, and (don't judge me) fried okra

Wednesday: Ethiopian food night! Yekik Wet Besiga (spicy beef with split peas) Yebesele Dinich (potatoes), injera bread

Thursday: YO-YO again... another basketball game

Friday: Savory Cheese Soup, salad, wheat rolls

To read more recipes or to link your own, visit OrgJunkie.com.

Haitian Adoptive Families: We are Praying!

Those of you who read my blog who are also adoptive families know. You just know. You know the emotional ups and downs of adoption, the frustration over the lack of information, and the need to balance the acknowledgment of God's sovereignty over the whole situation with your need to be proactive. Some of you reading this are the precious ones who came alongside us in our journey to Minte, joining us on that roller coaster ride. Not only did you ride it, prayed us through it. Some of you reading this also walked through last week with our family as my daughter went on an adoption journey to China with another precious family... a journey that didn't turn out as planned. Blogs have a way of doing that... of weaving our lives together, of drawing us into one another's stories for a time. I know there are people who read my blog during our adoption and prayed our precious child HOME, who for one reason or another, don't stop by anymore. Believe me, that's okay, because we are not that fascinating. ;) God, in His providence, ordained that for a time people would know our story and be part of getting Minte to us, to be a part of how God "sets the lonely in families."

After our week last week, I thought my fearful mind had gone everywhere there was to go in adoption. I thought I'd read every scenario and made up every fearful situation there was to imagine. I fancied myself just that good a worrier.

Then the Haitian earthquake hit.

Can you imagine? Adoption, especially international ones, can take you places you never expected. You're dealing with foreign governments, family histories (yours and your child's), and life's most dire moments all begin to intersect. So, what if, in the midst of it, there's a disaster "of Biblical proportions?" What if, in the midst of the angst surrounding your prospective child's care, you had to worry that their orphanage might have collapsed on them, or wonder whether they or their caregivers were still alive? What if, in the midst of waiting for those elusive calls and emails containing precious shreds of information, there was such a disaster that all communications for any purposes were shut down?

No. I simply can't imagine.

That's the road many, many Haitian adoptive families are walking today. And I want to walk that road with them. There are so, so many things to pray for right now for the country of Haiti. The infrastructure, the hospitals, the relief organizations, the injured, those who were already sick, those who are trapped and still alive, missionaries... on and on. And I am praying for all of those.

But today on my blog I want to focus on on just one group, as God has ordained that I could identify with them in this way: the waiting adoptive families. Here are a few blogs I found. In the sidebars of those blogs are others. I encourage you to keep on clicking! There is an amazing network of blogs, each of a family and their story as they walk this unspeakably hard road that God ordained for such a time as this. When they started the paperwork and began this tumultuous ride, they had no way of knowing that one of the biggest disasters in Haiti's history would happen during it. But God did. And He also knew that some of us would want to come alongside them and pray.

If one of these blogs is yours, and you followed the trackback here, please, please know you are being prayed for. Your precious, amazing children are being prayed for. The adoption community is lifting you up. I know there are no words right now, but there are prayers.

Sea Salt Mosaic

Bringing Our Boys... From Haiti to Home

A Twinkle in My Eye

The Livesay [Haiti] Weblog

Cry Haiti

Countdown to Homecoming

A Family for Frankie

One Girl

Life, Kids, Homeschooling, Adoption

Haiti Adoption: The Journey and Details

The Ivey Family (CNN video interview)

Not How It Was Supposed To Be

My daughter is home from China. Yesterday's homecoming was not the reunion at the airport that we were envisioning taking place a week from now.

I would never and could never presume to speak for what our precious friends are going through. But since my daughter walked this road so closely alongside them last week, it has touched our family in a profound way as well. We are dealing with grief in our home.

A good friend suggested I study the "cycles of grief" and become acquainted with the grieving process, and then just encourage her to talk about it when she feels like it. Good advice. Of course, I want to be careful what psychology I read, having learned to stay away from the "Man Most High" theology, which so permeates even Christian psychology. Any psychological help I embrace must hold a very high view of God.

This morning I came across the following article which I found particularly helpful. Exploring Myths and Transformation In The Grief Process. For Christians, the "grief cycle" has been transformed. We have a Redeemer. We can grieve with hope. Please read the article if your life has been touched by grief. (And, in this Genesis 3 world, whose life hasn't?)

I certainly do not have any great insights to share at this point. She only arrived home from the airport yesterday and we have not yet begun to get back to any sort of "normal" here. For us, that time is much closer than for our friends.

But, there is grace.

When we were going through our adoption, I read John Piper's book, Future Grace. (The first 3 chapters are available for download here.) I cannot stress enough what a profoundly helpful book that is for any Christian, but I almost feel like it should be required reading for any Christian adoptive family. The day before they were to say goodbye to Johanna, I told my sweet daughter that there was grace already apportioned to her for the day ahead. God already knew she would need it, and it was there for her... waiting.

And it was.

The road ahead is a long one for our friends. I don't know what it will be like for my daughter. But, like the above article says,

"...the historic, Christian Faith actually provides the possibility of a more hopeful, less messy experience of grief by providing a strong Redeemer – a living Person who calls Himself “The Way, Truth, and Life” – and who enters our world to transform it, by “bearing our griefs and sorrows” (Isaiah 53). His victory at the cross, triumphal resurrection, and promise to begin renewing all things right now (especially our hearts of stone), as well as a future new creation where death is finally and completely removed, changes everything. No longer do those who look to him need to sorrow “as those who have no hope” (I Thess. 4:13)."

Please, please continue praying for our friends. And for Johanna.

All I Really Want For Christmas

Just before Christmas 2007 we began our adoption. By Christmas 2008, we had received a gift which was immeasurably more than we could've asked or imagined. (Eph. 3:20-21) Adoption blesses all involved. To HIM be the glory.

Here are a few glimpses of our journey.

When You Look At An Adopted Child, You're Looking At A Survivor

Two years ago on Thanksgiving Day, after the dishes were cleared, we filled out our initial application to adopt. A baby girl. Last year, there "she" sat at our Thanksgiving table, a just-turned-10 year old boy. Now he's 11, much bigger than the picture in my sidebar, and I simply can't imagine our life without him.

Recently I heard a speaker say "When you look at an adopted child, you're looking at a survivor."








By now you have probably either heard of the movie, The Blind Side, or hopefully have seen it. I could relate to so much of it. Especially this:

"You're changing his life, Sweetie."

"No, he's changing mine."

By God's grace, He protected my "blind side" and opened my eyes to what he had for our family. We have been forever changed. I've had so much for which to be thankful this weekend.

Our TV Debut!

Recently we got to do something so fun! We were able to be part of our ABC affiliate's morning television show, "Good Morning Texas." We have some sweet friends who own a WONDERFUL company called "Adoption Bug" that sells adoption-themed apparel. Our fun friend was invited to be on the show and she needed some models for her t-shirts. She asked if our family would be interested. Since God seems to have taken to having me live my life on just the other side of my comfort zone I said we'd love to! SO... without further ado...



Not that I want you to watch it again (please please no...) I must add a little commentary. I had NO IDEA the host was going to ask me to turn around. Really? Turn around? On TV? Turn around where my backside is? After I got a chance to watch the footage I saw that I did make sort of a "seriously-I'm-supposed-to-turn-around-I-wish-I-would've-spent-more-time-on-the-back-of-my-hair" face. Fortunately for the viewers what they needed to zoom in on was, um, north of the waistline. (Unlike the day before when some women had been modeling leggings. ::shudder::) See the thing is, I totally forgot there was a scripture on the back of the shirt. So for a milisecond I was completely at a loss as to why she would want me to turn around. And the host called me "mom" and I wasn't sure who's mom she was talking to. Plus the hair thing and the lingering thought that the camera adds 10 pounds. Anyway, there's our 23 seconds of fame! (And Tammi comped me this shirt for showing my backside on TV. Well, well worth it!!)

Oh, BY ALL MEANS do click on over to adoptionbug.com and order some shirts! They are precious!!

And if you haven't yet, I sincerely hope you catch the "adoption bug" in your family. You'll never be the same! Adoption ROCKS!

Yesterday Last Year... Yesterday This Year

September 9, 2008~ We had just completed the 20+ hours of travel to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, slept as well as we could between jet lag, adrenaline, and the braying of donkeys in the street outside of our room. Bleary-eyed but excitedly we got up early the next morning and headed to a coffee shop to wait for our orphanage director to meet us with our precious new son. What a surreal moment! We ran up to him as he exited her car and had a wonderful meeting... complete with a mom/son embrace, me touching his sweet head about 27 times and Luke scooping him up in a big bear hug. Before we headed over to the US Embassy we paused for this quick photo:


September 9, 2009~ We woke up thoroughly rested, the 5 of us in our home, together for the 363rd night. After Luke and Bethany left (he took her to her writing class near his office), the boys and I had a fun morning of donuts, reading aloud and watching "Walker: Texas Ranger" which the boys faithfully DVR. We met Luke and Bethany for lunch (after he picked her up from writing class) and had a fun "adoption day" lunch at Taco Bueno, reminiscent of the first meal we had once we hit US soil upon our return last year. We stopped at Target on the way home and Minte picked out a new Lego set, his new passion. I also grabbed a coffee at Starbucks. (Adoption Day must include coffee, after all!) He spent the afternoon building with Legos and then we picked up a friend of his on the way to where we celebrated Adoption Day with family at a pizza/arcade/go-cart/laser tag place. After a fun evening of celebrating with some friends and extended family, we stopped for this quick photo:


As I look at those two sets of smiling faces, exactly a year apart, I can't help but think of so many memories of this past year. God has been so good during Minte's transition into our family. In many ways it seems he's always been here. In just as many ways it's hard to believe it's already been a year. Time seems slow and fast at once. Happiness and joy over our newly-formed family coexist with the sadness and grief that comes with adoption. There is a comfortable familiarity but still much to learn about each other.

Through it all, there is one constant- love. The instantaneous, indescribable love we felt for him the moment we embraced him, as well as the abiding, never-failing love of our Heavenly Father Who has held us all during this entire process. I can't wait to see what the next year brings!

I Am Second. Third, Actually. Maybe Even Fourth.

Maybe you've seen the billboards around your area, or the website advertised: I Am Second. The meaning behind it is that you are second behind Jesus. When Bethany went on her mission trip to Mexico in March, their motto was "I Am Third," meaning, that first is Jesus, second is others, third is yourself. I think that is pretty appropriate! I learned years ago that that is what J.O.Y. stands for- Jesus, Others, Yourself. Remembering that helps me keep lots of things in perspective in my daily interactions and expectations.

This spring, I have thought of those words in a different way. As an adoptive mom, I am not the first mom that Minte ever had. Since he was in the care of others for 5 years before he came home to live with us, I'm not really even the second. I am third. I've read a lot of blogs in the adoption world, and there are as many opinions about how to refer to this as their are bloggers and families. I certainly don't think the way we have done things is the only "right" way (or even right at all some days!) but I certainly have no problem taking my place as "third" in order of the caregivers in his life. Maybe even fourth, now that I think of it!

This past Mother's Day was an important day. A year ago (and the year before that), Minte was in an orphanage, wondering if he would ever have another mother, hoping that a family would adopt him. This year... here he is! Of course, he had never heard of such a holiday. They don't have "Mother's Day" in Ethiopia. So, when the day came, we explained to him what it was. As we began talking about Mother's Day, it became evident (and very obvious) that it wasn't just about me, his American mother. When he came home to live with us here, his (now deceased) Ethiopian parents came too, in a very real way. They are talked about and remembered in some way in our home every day. They are part of his every day conversation and a very real memory for him. So, how could we leave out his Ethiopian mother on Mother's Day? We decided to plant a rose bush for her in the back yard. I asked him if he wanted to plant something, light a candle, release a balloon... other things I had heard/read about. He chose to plant something. When he and his Dad went to the store for the rose bush, they came back with two because he wanted to plant one for me, too. Isn't that sweet? Here is what we ended up doing on Mother's Day... our "Mother's Day Garden:"


I love the way it turned out! His Ethiopian mother's rose bush is on the left, and mine is on the right. The purple flowers in the middle are for the relative who cared for him before he came to the orphanage, and the yellow flowers are for all the "mommies" at the orphanage. The stone in the middle is so appropriate: Ecclesiastes 3:2, "To everything there is a season..." All of us have had our season in this precious boy's life. Some object to referring to oneself as "2nd mommy" or "3rd mommy" in a child's life because that implies that there may be someone after you. Well? None of us knows what tomorrow holds. I can't be certain I will be the last and final mommy he ever has, but this garden reminds me that God is there at every season and will bring just the people into his life to care for him when it is time. This is my season, and I'm just glad to be a part of God's plan for this amazing young man, whether I'm his final mommy (which I hope I am!) or not. God is so faithful.

As Father's Day approached, we asked him what he would like to do, and decided with him that we would plant a tree for his Ethiopian father. We have a shady little nook outside our dining room window that is perfect for a Japanese Maple. It is a window we look out of everyday, so he will be able to see it all the time. Yesterday he and his brother and dad took some time to plant the tree.




I love the way this turned out, too! The tree will grow to about 6 feet tall (about as tall as his American dad), and will be a constant reminder of his precious Ethiopian father, who had so much to do with the man Minte will one day be. As I watched those precious boys (and dad) plant that tree, I was reminded of Psalm 1, and the fact that I've written their names beside that Psalm in my Bible. Oh how I pray that they would be planted like well-watered trees because they meditate on God's Word, whose leaves will not wither and that whatever they do will prosper. What a wonderful reminder! The stone at the bottom of this tree is Psalm 25:4 "Show me Thy ways O Lord, teach me Thy paths."

Hopefully we have helped him to feel like he has honored the memory of his precious Ethopian parents who loved him so much. He knows he was loved and because of that has been able to readily receive our love. It's important for him to know he can remember them. He can miss them. He can talk about them, and most importantly- honor them. These first Mother's and Father's Days have been important milestones in our family. We are so blessed.

Ten Things I Love About My Dad

by Minte, Father's Day 2009


When I helped Minte make his Father's Day card for Luke, I asked him to tell me ten things he loves about his dad. (He's been here about 10 months and he is 10 years old, so that number seemed about right!)

Here's his "top ten," exactly as he said it. :)

1. "He takes us to gun range place."
2. "He play with me, like play baseball or football."
3. "He taught me how to play golf today. There's a lot of things he taught me... like bike, swim..."
4. "He let us mow the back yard and the front. And teach us."
5. "He doesn't drink alcohol."
6. "He's a good father."
7. "I will have fun with him."
8. "He love us."
9. "He's good at playing golf."
10. "We love him because he loves Jesus."

A Greater Grace

Well it was a dark, stormy Monday morning here today. While we really need the rain, and I love hearing it these mornings while I'm curled up with my Bible and my coffee, I always worry about my sweet husband and everyone else who is out driving in it. The worst of it seems to have blown through, so for that I am thankful!

This morning I was having my not-so-quiet quiet time while the thunder was crashing outside, and soon enough I had a shaky, scared mini dachshund in my lap. Oh, how he hates storms! So, I held that little whining, shaky dog, reassuring him that everything would be okay, while I prayed to my Heavenly Father, bringing Him everything that totally scares me. I saw the similarities immediately. The storms rage, and God, Who sees the big picture (the radar) knows it will soon pass and that it is bringing something much-needed into my life, but I sit, whining, shaking and restless in His lap. During my prayer time I had my Bible open to a passage I had read in the book of James. As I was praying through my ever-familiar "junk" that it seems I always have to ask forgiveness for, I was actually starting to become discouraged with my struggle with the same old things. While in some areas I see growth and fruit so readily, there seem to be certain issues, my besetting sins I suppose, that I continue to bring to Him day after day. What is UP with that???

When I opened my eyes to comfort my trembling, scared little dog, my eyes fell upon a verse that jumped right out at me because I had color-coded it during a previous study: "But He gives a greater grace." (James 4:6a) Well, that says it all, doesn't it? I should write that on the inside of my glasses today and see everything through those words. He gives a greater grace than that storm that's blowing outside my window. He gives a greater grace than my Grandmother's undiagnosed illness. He gives a greater grace than a car accident on a rainy commute to work. He gives a greater grace than parenting challenges. He gives a greater grace than any sin I could bring to the table. And I love the "but". "But" puts whatever comes before it in a different light. Focusing on my fleshly shortcoming is a form of pride, and on earthly challenges breeds fear. Say what I may, I can tag that "but He gives a greater grace" onto the end of it and that changes everything! In that moment I recognize His sovereignty. I love it. Thank you, Lord.

Yesterday while the rest of the family was setting up for our final Awana awards ceremony (under our leadership), Minte and I had the privilege of welcoming home his most recent friend from the orphanage. Welcome Ellie!!!

There's a picture of "greater grace" right there! There are children in orphanages with no families. But, He gives a greater grace. Sometimes parents experience fertility issues. But, He gives a greater grace. The adoption process and the costs involved sometimes seem insurmountable. But, He gives a greater grace. Sometimes Mommies have surgeries just weeks before they are to travel to bring home their new child, and think they cannot travel. But He gives a greater grace. To follow Ellie's story, visit her family's blog here.

Maybe you are considering adoption, either for the first time or a subsequent time, and feel like there are barriers. Or maybe you are in the midst of an adoption and have hit a wall. I encourage you to speak those very real obstacles aloud to yourself (and to God) today, and then tag it with "but He gives a greater grace, " humble yourself before the Lord, and see what happens!

Truck &Tooth Pull and Sink Serenade

So at the end of my last post I shared that Minte had tried to pull his tooth a few days ago using his RC monster truck. I was uploading pictures and video this morning and came across the footage... so here it is!

Just before the big moment... the string was tied, he was psyched up and ready. (Oh, and I misquoted him in my post. As you can see in the following video, instead of "1,2,3" he yells "Fie-yah!!!" ("Fire," LOL)...




It ended up just making it bleed worse, and didn't quite accomplish what he thought it would. Not sure he'll ever try that again! But it's something a guy's gotta at least attempt once, I suppose.

Here is another video of lunchtime a couple of weeks ago. The boys were in the kitchen making their lunch and I was in another part of the house. I began to hear music (complete with drums), coming from them and not the iPod dock, so I popped in to listen. Minte was singing a song in another language (besides Amharic) that he spoke as a small child, and Kyle was accompanying him using the nearest "drum" he could find. So, for your listening (and viewing) pleasure, here is their brief lunchtime "sink serenade." (I say "brief" because it ends rather abrubtly. They are starving artists, after all...)




Never a dull moment at our house!

Monday Minte-isms and Menu

I hope you had a joyous Easter weekend! We sure did. By God's grace, it was just the weekend we needed it to be. We started it off Friday night with a wonderful Passover Seder meal with our Bible fellowship class, had a worshipful time at our church's service and then a relaxing time at home on Sunday. We very much needed some time at home, and God granted it to us yesterday. I feel renewed and refreshed and ready to take on the week! Here is a photo of my precious children in front of the sea of flowers on the stage at our church this weekend. (You can click the photo to make it bigger.) I cannot begin to tell you how happy I am that Minte is with us this year. Last year at this point we were still on our journey to adopt a little baby girl, so this photo is a reminder of God's direction and His perfect will! (In case you are unfamiliar with our adoption story, or would like to learn more, click on the "our adoption" button in the sidebar. To read about how our journey to a baby girl led us to a 10 year old boy click on "a little background" below the picture.)

Minte (MIN-tay), our 10 year old Ethiopian son, has now been with us about 7 months. It has been such a fun journey so far! One of the most interesting and daily-evolving things has been his English language acquisition. I never knew it would be so fascinating (and funny!) to live with an English language learner! Fascinating because he is learning English at such a surprisingly fast pace. What a testimony to the intricate human mind, and to our great God who fashioned it so. Funny because, well, it just is. Transitioning an older, hurting, grieving child into the family can be hard some days. So, God sprinkles it with humor in various forms to cover more of it with joy and laughter. So, I thought I'd start off this Monday sharing a few "Minte-isms."

Here is how you should read them with the "proper" accent:

~All "r's" are rolled (I simply love this. It makes even the most ordinary word fun!)

~"a" sounds are pronounced "ah", so words like "asphalt" (what he calls the street) sound really cool. I think that word is the same in Amharic.

~short "i" is pronounced "ee" as in "beeg". "Mommy beeg lahves buna" was one of his first sentences to me. (Mommy big loves coffee. He figured me out right away. Of course, I was jet-lagged.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Again heart my peenie!" = an exclamation after about the 5th time he stubbed his pinkie toe one day

"Men-eh-nems" = M & M's

"Big crap" = pick it up. Seriously, that's how he pronounces it. It cracks me up too much to correct him.

"Off it" = turn off the TV or light, or delete a picture from the camera

"I'm a-stinking" = I'm thinking. Another variation is "Are you a-stinking what I'm a-stinking?"

"Little bit no loud please." = turn down the volume on the TV or radio

"hiney" = honey

"lift" = leaf

"lift" = elevator

"lift" = escalator

"upstairs" = anything on top of anything else

"downstairs" = anything underneath anything else

"tim-ah-tim" = tomato

"Come on!" = Could you please come here a moment, I require assistance.

"peejah mah" = pajamas

"off-side" = outside

"What eez zas my name?" = what is this called? For example: "Spider house what eez my name?" - his reading sheet had a picture of a web on it and he didn't know what it was called.

"Longa or short day?" = Is it cold or hot today, do I wear shorts or pants?

"Whatzat mean-say?" = What does that mean?

"Zees one" = this one

"Zas way" = that way

"heart" = hot or hurt, depending on the context. For example, "Ees really heart!" requires investigation...

"bucket" = pocket

"han" = hair or hand, depending on the context

"I have a cushion" = I have a question

"Cushion me zis" = answer this for me

"power" (often pronounced "powah") = gas, of the intestinal variety

"Powah ees cahming!!" means, well... get ready.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There are many, many more. I hope I can remember more, because it's been non-stop for 7 months, and he comes up with new pronunciations and words daily. I love it!!!



Now, here's what's cooking at our house this week:

Monday: BBQ brisket, mashed potatoes, grean beans, wheat rolls
Tuesday: Roast Chicken Chimichangas, black beans, corn casserole
Wednesday: Honey Pecan Pork Chops, baked potatoes, peas, corn on the cob
Thursday: YOYO (You're on you're own... leftovers)
Friday: Avocado Soup with Chicken and Lime

I'm not making anything Ethiopian for dinner this week, but I made some Ethiopian Lentils over the weekend, and I'm pretty sure we'll be whipping up some spicy pasta for lunch one day. He beeg loved the African Chicken I made last week, even though that's a primarily west African dish.

For more menus, to post your own, or to get a helpful menu-planning template, visit Laura. I hope you have a great week!

In Like A Lion

I have been thinking of the saying, "March comes in like a lion and goes out like a lamb" in recent days. As March has been approaching, the wind has been whipping here like crazy, and the way it's been blowing my hair up over my head, I'm afraid I've been coming in like a lion!

On this first day of March, I was thinking about the saying and also reminded of our visit to the Lion Park during our adoption trip to Ethiopia six months ago. I have not blogged about the events of each day of the trip yet, and it may take me years to do it. I'm still processing so much of it in my mind. Yesterday we did a presentation about our trip to our Bible Fellowship class at church, and my husband included some photos from this particular day, which brought to mind some wonderful memories.

We were so blessed to be able to spend over a week as a family in Addis Ababa, seeing the sights and absorbing the culture with our new son. It was an unforgettable, set-apart, God-ordained time. Simply amazing. We saw so many things that we may never see again, exhibits and places introducing us to the fascinating country of Ethiopia, but I have to say... my focus was on him. Mintesinot Alemu. Our son. My son. I was watching him act silly with his new brother and sister and look adoringly at his new Dad. I was hugging him when I had the opportunity and touching his head. Watching him jump and dance and sing. Listening to him speak his wonderful language. Hearing him call me "Mommy." I was, and continue to be, in awe of this precious child who has been gifted by God in so many ways... so resilient, so funny. He is an example of a child whose heart has been guarded... protected by God's loving hand. He has been through unspeakably difficult things, but has such joy. Oh how I love him, and I'm so glad he's ours.

When I think back to our time in Addis, I feel afresh the excitement of the "newness" of it all, but I love reflecting on it from the comfortable familiarity of today. It was all still so new that day, the day we visited the Lion Park. Being that close to lions was definitely a new experience for our family! You can stand literally a couple of feet from from them. There are lions, bars, chain link, then you. Right there. Lions. Staring you in the face. I remember standing there and thinking, "I can't believe I'm this close to a lion." Several Bible verses about lions ran through my mind that day. At one point, we were watching one, and it roared an ear-splitting roar. I could actually smell its breath! Not many people get close enough to a lion to smell its breath and walk away from the experience! I thought of Daniel and David. I imagined how the early Christians must have felt as they were forced to come face to face with lions. I remembered our reading of David Livingstone's encounter with a lion and thought of it with a fresh perspective. It was spine-tingling enough with two layers of fence between us! Some of the lions would lay close to the bars and you could reach their manes, which, to my surprise, some people would give a tug. It would never occur to me to pull a lion's mane! It was a very interesting day, indeed.

During our visit, we toured the circle of cages, pausing to take some pictures, watching them eat and sharing some of the thoughts I mentioned above. All the while, I was fixed on our new son, wondering what was going through his mind. At this point, having only known his American family for two days or so, and knowing very little English, he wasn't able to tell us what he was thinking. His eyes and facial expressions spoke volumes to me, though. At one point we paused for this picture:

It was a great shot, two lions together (as close as I'll ever put my children to them!) and a perfect picture spot. Our new son. Our new family. New siblings. New parents of three. A new country. A new experience. A new identity. A new season.

I wish I could post another photo that we received that week, but I won't. It's Minte's to share someday. But I will describe it to you. Keep the above picture in your mind's eye, only remove Bethany and Kyle. Imagine Minte 4 or 5 years younger, with a missing front tooth. Envision a handsome, tall Ethiopian man kneeling down next to him with his arm around him. The layer of chain link fence is gone, and only the bars are there. Picture the same lion in the background, in that same position. A smiling boy with his smiling father, spending a sunny afternoon at the Lion Park together. That's the photo we received, of Minte and his Ethiopian father kneeling in what could have been that exact spot a few years ago.

What was so new to us that week was actually familiar territory to him. Of course, experiencing it with us was new, but he'd been there before, maybe even multiple times. Everything on this side of it, now that we've been home, has been new territory for him, but familiar to us. The new and the familiar, woven together on a daily basis. The Master Weaver, expertly weaving a beautiful story out of broken threads.

Being united with your newly adopted child can "come in like a lion." There's a flurry of activity, a whirlwind of new emotions, and a beautiful new definition of "family" brings with it a new season. Some of it is unsettling, much of it is foreign, in its own way it's all wonderful, though at times it will blow your hair back! You'll stand closer to situations and emotions than you ever thought you would. You'll stare things in the face you'd have never thought you'd dare to. You'll simultaneously stand with one foot rooted in the familiar and one foot planted in the new. But you'll love more fiercely than any lion's roar.

Wendem

(brothers)

A Taste Of Home

It's hard to believe Minte has been home almost 6 months! During that time, he and I have enjoyed our Sunday evenings together. The rest of the family is at church at Awana, and since he has not started attending it yet, he and I stay home. If the weather is nice, we'll play in the backyard or take a walk, sometimes we watch a movie, play card games, or work puzzles. We love that time together, and it has been a treasured time for me because he really opens up and talks to me about how he feels about things, and also tells me stories about his life in Ethiopia. What a gift these Sunday evenings have been!

In the past few weeks, one of our favorite things to do is also cook together. I haven't yet gathered all of the necessary spices to cook many of the dishes from the Ethiopian cookbooks we have (linked at the end of this post) but he was so excited when he found out we had some bere bere spice (Ethiopian chili powder), because he knew how to make one of his favorite spicy pasta dishes. He had seen his Ethiopian mother make it before, and had had it many times in his life. He literally jumped up and down at the thought of having it here.

A couple of weeks ago I asked him if I could photograph him making it and share his recipe on the blog.

First, I have to show you the cute cannister I found for keeping our bere bere spice. He was so excited to see that it is out with the other cannisters, and he can use it any time he wants on pasta, eggs, etc. (It really is a staple!) He seemed genuinely pleased that it is now a permanent part of the "decor" in our kitchen.

I found this one and a bigger one just like it recently at a Ross discount store in our area. In case you can't see it, here's a closer picture, so you can see the African women on it:

When he saw the women with baskets on their heads he said, "Ees Ee-tiopia!" Love it.
Here's what bere bere looks like. Like I said, it is a chili powder and it is VERY spicy. I was able to take his "recipe" and measure it out, and it comes out very spicy, so you may want to tone it down. He laughs because his pasta makes Mommy sweat. LOL

Here's the recipe:

Minte's Favorite Spicy Ethiopian Pasta

2 medium tomatoes, diced
1/2 (half) a large white onion, chopped
2+ tablespoons canola oil
3 1/2 teaspoons (or less!) of bere bere spice
pasta of your choice (we usually use spaghetti)


Saute the onion in a bit of oil, then add the tomatoes. Saute together for a few minutes, until onions begin to look clear and tomatoes are soft.

Add 2 tablespoons of oil and bere bere, 1 teaspoon at a time (Minte likes up to 3 1/2 teaspoons of it. I cut him off there, but he says that's not "too spicy." You be the judge.)
The result is a sauce the consistency of a paste. Sometimes he adds a bit more oil.
He likes just a small amount on his pasta, then he stirs it all to make a thin coating on it. A little goes a long way!

Every Sunday evening I also love how it makes the house smell, and I wonder what memories that aroma might be bringing back to him. Judging from his smile, they must be good ones.
I keep the rest of the spaghetti noodles in a ziploc bag next to a small container of the bere bere sauce, and he eats it for lunch during the week, or whenever he wants/ needs a "taste of home."

Here are a few cookbooks I have found. Minte loves to look through them, and I hope to be cooking from them soon.

Exotic Ethiopian Cooking: Society, Culture, Hospitality & Traditions

Foods Of Ethiopia

Discovery of a Continent
The Recipe of Love

A Set-Apart Week

First of all, thank you to all who have commented, emailed or Facebooked me to let me know you are praying for Luke and the team (Andrew, Craig, Dave, Jill and the others) in Ethiopia this week. It has apparently been an indescribably awesome time for them over there.

The first thing I heard, through a friend, when I found out that Luke had arrived safely was that he had met the Seay family, who is over there now bringing home their two precious kids, one of whom was Minte's best friend at the Children's Home. I have corresponded with them via email for months, and I am so jealous that Luke got to meet them. And in Ethiopia during this precious time! So, so fun.

I finally got to talk to Luke for the first time Sunday morning our time. We were texted a phone number as we were on our way to my niece's baptism. I had no idea if my phone would call ET (we usually use Skype from our computer at home, and all of my Africa calling cards were at home also... so who knows how much it cost!) I sat in my car, as people were streaming into the church, soaking up every word and detail. What an interesting day that was, as I took a mental step back and looked at the whole picture. Luke, across the world, having attended a long, loud, charismatic and lively Ethiopian church service (3+ hours long) and so different than our home church. Us, attending a formal, full-length Catholic mass, the boys in coats and ties... also so different than our own church. How God was seeing fit for us to have such completely different worship experiences on the same day... I just love it. Just like heaven. Glory to God.

We had a long day Sunday with a post-baptism family gathering, then doing what Luke usually does to facilitate/coordinate our Awana club at church. All the while missing him and wondering what he was doing, all the while not knowing a time-bomb was ticking in our own family. For it was just 24 hours later after we had returned from the King Tut exhibit at the museum for a school field trip that we were struck with the violent stomach flu virus that has been sweeping through entire schools and communities here lately. That completely knocked us off our feet for Monday and Tuesday. Oh, man. We subsequently found out that 20+ people who were at the family party on Sunday were sick, too, complete with fainting and all manner of illnesses. Not good. But, we are fine now and I think everyone has gotten over it. I kept thinking that I was just glad it was not Luke... that he was well and where he needed to be. And how glad that I was home and not out of the country. I have been that sick in another country and there is just nothing like that. :::shudder:::

So, that, coupled with the fact that time on the internet is very limited and unpredictable in Ethiopia, and Luke doesn't spend time on the computer typing up his thoughts... in fact, many of them are probably still "brewing"- explains why there have been no updates from me during this week. I have talked to him each morning (via Skype) to tell him goodnight and get a short recap of their day, and late at night our time to tell him good morning and pray over their activities for the new day. I have been ever so grateful that we have been able to talk that much, as that is a first. We have never been in such frequent contact when one of us is gone. That was a blessing.

For the most detailed, written-from-the-heart updates, read some posts written by fellow team members here.

As for what I've heard from Luke during the week...

They have visited some different programs, such as a school for street kids, a vocational training center for boys who formerly lived on the streets, a home for former p*rostitutes through the Win Souls For God Ministry. Very touching, very impressive what God is doing through them in these vital areas.

The team visited different orphanages, with children at various stages of the adoption process... those who have yet to be referred, those who have been referred and are awaiting passing court so they can be brought home, those who are simply orphans who may or may not have the necessary paperwork to ever be referred... It's all James 1:27. It's all God-ordained, and it's been an unspeakable privilege for them to be with those precious children. I remember when Minte was still at his orphanage and had been referred to us, but we hadn't passed court yet... he technically had a family, it was just a matter of time, but he was blessed beyond measure by those who came to visit him on mission teams. He still remembers many of them by name: Steve, Josh, Amy and others who have taken the time to email me... They were agents of God's love and grace to him, and his face lights up when he is reminded of them. (In fact, he recognized some faces waiting for him at the airport, and he was so happy to see them again!) For that slice of time there was someone to play hot wheels cars with him, jump rope with him, blow bubbles or run relay races, laugh and love. The minutes that otherwise might have seemed to crawl by for him while he waited for his family could fly by for a time, until we could be united. They were "visiting him in his distress." At that point he was anxiously awaiting his new family, having lost his first family. By definition that is most certainly a time of "distress" and by God's grace there were willing hearts who journeyed to go and be with him during a time when we couldn't. We have always been so thankful for that, and what joy it has been for Luke and the others on the team to be able to do that for other children. I have been praying for all of those children and their future families throughout this week. And, of course, the blessing goes both ways. Our team members have been forever changed.

They were privileged to visit those who are sick and dying of HIV/AIDS. They were profoundly affected by their time with those precious souls, and privileged to pray over them. They were able to visit schools and villages. They met with a top government official (though their meeting with THE top government official didn't happen due to the African Union Summit taking place.) Like I said, TIA= This Is Africa. But, the fact that it was even on the schedule is a testimony to our big God. And it was not for nothing, I just know it. I believe in my heart that it was an open door to something in the future and there is greater glory in the making.

Our organization has made some very good contacts and ministry connections over the course of the week, including bringing someone on board there do continue several facets of our work there. I just love how God brings us together with people. These are precious working relationships.

He got to witness Jill be united with their precious daughter. The photo I received in email last night took my breath away. Amazing. Simply amazing.

He got to visit with Minte's friends who are still waiting for families. He gave them the gift bags that Minte had lovingly prepared, and saw them literally jump up and down when they saw them.

One of the most amazing things happened just this morning. I didn't set my alarm for dark:30 because I am still getting over the bug, but for some reason I bolted awake just after 6:00 AM. I felt the sudden compulsion to go call Luke. I hadn't been able to get him last night at all (sometimes phone connections are tricky.) After several attempts this morning I was able to reach him on his cell which was at around 3:30 PM his time. When he answered I could hear a garbled swarm of voices around him. At that very moment he was standing in front of Minte's former home, surrounded by neighbors, friends and relatives who knew and remembered Minte. He had been showing them Minte's photos and taking pictures of them as well. They were so happy to see how Minte is doing and to meet his new Dad. What a precious time! And God saw fit to wake me up so I could be part of it! Amazing, isn't it? A relative took Luke to where Minte's family member/caregiver (prior to his going to the orphanage) worked, and she was so excited to see photos as well, and Luke was able to video a wonderful message from her to Minte. Minte was so excited to learn all of this this morning. These connections are so meaningful to him. The love he has received from his Ethiopian family has really paved the way for him to receive love from us, and most of all his Heavenly Father. There is no such thing as a child having too many people love him. It is wonderful! He has seen that those who loved him there know us who love him here, and we are all connected. He has seen us embrace those who have loved and cared for him in his past, thereby acknowledging the important, God-ordained part they have had in his life and recognizing that his life didn't just begin when he came to our family. All of this is very important for his emotional and spiritual stability, and we are so blessed to have this opportunity to nurture these relationships to his family and culture of origin. We understand that this is a rare blessing, and we don't want to take it for granted or miss chances to foster this connection. God was so good to provide this, just hours before Luke was to go catch his plane to come home.

At this moment he is zipping up his bags and on his way to the airport to begin the long journey home. Thank you, THANK YOU to those of you who have been praying. He has stayed well, which in itself is a miracle. As a Crohn's patient, we never thought he could ever travel like this, and to travel without major health issues is Ephesians 3:20-21. Truly. We don't take that lightly. He will be arriving home tomorrow afternoon to three kids and a wife who can't wait to see his precious face. Speaking of that face, here are two photos that I received from a team member yesterday that blessed my heart:

Visiting with one of Minte's friends at the Children's Home. (I can't show the whole pic, but believe me, this child is precious. Just precious. In fact, when Minte found out Luke was going to ET he asked, "To bring C. home?" Uh, it's not that easy baby...

Luke and a precious girl in Bole Bulbula. I asked Minte about her clothes and he said those are for "Bet Christian"- church. They handed out soccer balls to the children, and it looks like the boy behind him must've put his in his shirt!